Dr. Asshole

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I know mom and dad are going to love that title, but Spencer and I referred to the clerk at the train station as Dr. Asshole for the entire week, so I have to put it out there.

 

When we first went to the train station to buy our pass, there was a very nice lady and she was trying her best to help us, but she said she had lost her “specs,” and she wouldn’t be able to do the paperwork without them, so she told us to come back at 2:15PM, after their break time.

 

So we came back at 2:15PM, and no one was there.  Some crazy dude came and talked to us and asked where we were from, and we said America and he said, “I know that.”  He was from America too.  He lived there for like 45 years.  He basically said that Kodaikanal was a stupid place to go and if we wanted to see India we had to go to Varanasai.  We thanked him for the unwelcome criticism and tried to ignore him.

 

There was also some deal with we had to pay in American currency, which was a huge issue.

 

Anyway, we made it to the station around 5pm and it closed at 6pm.  The guy at the counter was like 50 and had a balding head that was very shiny and it looked like he was taking a long time with everyone.  Finally it got to us, and we told him that we wanted rail passes.

 

AND THEN THE FIGHT STARTED.

 

Well it wasn’t really that exciting, but seriously he opposed us just about every step of the way.  At first he didn’t seem to even know what we were talking about, but we KNEW that the rail passes existed and we knew the lady earlier in the day was going to get one for us, so we finally convinced him they were real, pretty much.  He asked us why we wanted them, and we said so we could ride trains without reservations.  And he said no, that was impossible.  And we said no, it wasn’t.  And he said it was impossible, and we said it wasn’t.

 

Anyway, we convinced him to let us give him money, so we whipped out our American money - $160 total – to buy the passes.  He said he didn’t want it.  We were astounded.  We had $160 US just like they asked, and he said he didn’t want it.  He said it was too much to count and insisted we got a hundred dollar bill.  That was a totally ridiculous request, so I sat there and counted it out for him.  He then proceeded to count it out like three more times, getting to $160 each time, and still said no.  We asked why, and he said it was too many bills.  Direct quotes:

 

Spencer:  So you’re not going to take our money because it’s difficult?

Dr. Asshole:  Yes.

 

Anyway, we eventually convinced him to take our money.  He then proceeded to write down the serial number of every bill except for the $1 bills while we waited, as if it were impossible to do it later, or let someone else do it.

 

Then we said that we wanted to get on a train to Kodaikanal for the night, and he said it was impossible.  We said no, it wasn’t, but he said yes, it’s impossible.  We said it doesn’t matter, just give us the pass for today.  That way we can use it today if we want to.

 

And when he took out the passes, he wrote the date for tomorrow, so that even if we wanted to use it that night, we couldn’t.

 

We hated that man.  We hated that man.  And thus we spent the next day in Chennai, thanks to Dr. Asshole.

 

Keep in mind that almost no part of this whole system was computerized, except for the time he actually punched in a reservation for a train, which we hardly needed but whatever.  When he took down the serial numbers, it was by hand.  When he took down our passport and visa information, it was by hand.  When he wrote down the numbers of the passes, it was by hand.  And it was just these HUGE ledger books that he would plop open and flip around in for a while.  It was kind of ridiculous.  And one time the next day the power went out, and the reservation system went offline for like a half an hour or so.  Power goes out from time to time with no warning because they just don’t make enough at the plants.